So many times, we ask the most generic questions when meeting a potential friend or mate.
"So, what do you do for fun?" is probably the most uncool question of our time.
First off, don't make me describe myself like that. Ask questions. Secondly, I don't plan out my fun that much.
Lastly, I don't know. JUST NORMAL STUFF!
Why is this question asked? So the asker can possibly spend time with the askee and build a bond. But a bond built off superficial interests won't last.
Instead, we should ask these 3 questions:
1. What's your highest value in life? Based off your action, not in theory.
It's a fancy way of saying, "What do you prioritize and make choices around?" We get in life what our highest value returns. If someone's highest value is drinking and yours is learning, it's probably not gonna work no matter how much you both like football.
2. On a scale of 0 to 10—with 0 being you want to kill yourself and 10 being you're as happy as can be—how much do you like being a person? A person, not a homeowner, teacher, or student.
If you fall in the same range, there are probably similarities in your choices and where you're at in life.
3. How do you define quality-of-life, and how would you rate yours so far?
If the person defines quality-of-life as vacations and big houses and you define it as purpose and volunteer work, it'd be great to know that from the jump. You could take the question a step further and ask if they feel their quality-of-life is ascending or descending.
Boom. Will save so much time.